OK, here it goes, my first blog. Until now, I have been too afraid to blog. Afraid of what? Offending someone, revealing my true self, not being perfect, showing that I'm really not the person that everyone thinks I am, saying something that pisses someone off. The list goes on. It is now undeniably clear to me that I have been paralyzed by this fear and a myriad of different fears my whole life. What has caused these fears? The answer to that involves lying on the couch and unloading my entire life - my childhood, family dynamics, relationship choices, career, demons, desires, and disasters. Therein lies the reason I want to blog. It's time to get over all this shit and move on. Time to steer my own life, time to really take the reigns and step up to be the person I know I can be. Time to stop letting others some silently, some not so silently, control me. Time to bust out of the apathy, depression, procrastination and self-doubt that follows from allowing yourself to be controlled by others without even really being cognizant of it. But I have to get over this stupid, annoying, persistent little gremlin called "fear" in order to do it so here it goes....
Today is Sunday. I love Sunday because it is the day that I've chosen to be the day that I get to do anything I want. Lay around in bed all day surfing the net, walk around the neighborhood and buy natural face creams, watch movies all day, drink copious amounts of white wine ( it's the only alcohol I drink) ...whatever. I also allow myself to break my usual Anna food plan which basically consists of LOTS of vegetables, a little fish, fruits, whole grains, and a few glasses of wine.
I basically eat what I call a Pescetarian Mediterranean diet. Which is essentially the Mediterranean diet with fish as the only animal protein consumed. I've flirted with vegan ism because I'm a huge animal advocate but I just didn't feel satisfied with all of the processed soy products and all of my reading suggests that wild fish is VERY good for we humans. And frankly, I just feel better when I have a little piece of fish with my vegetable smorgasbord, that's just me. I think we each have to find what works for our bodies but I believe in conscience eating. Being aware of where your food comes from and what it does to your body. I completely support those who are vegan and learned a great deal when I adopted the vegan diet for awhile. It forever changed my conscientiousness. Like I've really dialed back my consumption of dairy products...and other things. I also enjoy eggs occasionally. So I look for eggs by local farmers with happy chickens. I eat very little cheese ( and I try to find organic happy farm cheese). I look for wild fish not farm raised. I don't eat chicken, beef or pork ( oh the poor sweet little pigs). I cannot support the torture chambers that these poor animals have to live in so I take a strong stand on that front. And p.s. - the Mediterranean diet is excellent for our skin. All that olive oil, fresh veggies and fruit is a super skin nurturing formula. Just read "The Wrinkle Cure"
Anyway, on Sunday, I allow myself all the foods that I gently turn away from during the week. Cookies, french fries, potato chips, veggie pizza etc... I believe that it's important to always allow yourself a day to let the steam out and indulge. Knowing that I have Sunday makes it easier to abstain during the week. If I see that huge beautiful sugar cookie with white frosting sitting so pristinely in the coffee shop on a Tuesday I just say to myself, "I can have it on Sunday" This helps me not feel deprived. This method has been extremely successful in keeping myself very lean, healthy, and happy.
I am a yogi. Yoga is the only physical exercise I do ( besides performing on stage which is a whole other blog). I believe yoga is the perfect physical activity ( again another blog).
So, here I am lying in bed, my sweet is next to me. It's 1:00pm on Sunday. My laptop is on my lap, the television is on in the background. Channel surfing between "The Sopranos" , the news and the "Palladia" Channel ( tons of cool live concerts - great research for my singer/songwriter/performer self. ) Right now we've just landed on the "HDNet" channel because it's showing a James Taylor concert. My favorite kind of concert. Just him and a guitar, with a little accompanyment from a pianist on a baby grand piano. Absolutely lovely. And right in line with my duet - "DNA Sings"
So I think that's it for now. Thank you for being here and sharing in my "coming out" party. The "coming out of my Authentic Self." That is the journey I'm on. The quest for, exploration of, and celebration of my Authentic Self. It's a big step for me. And I want to change my life. Every bone in my body says this is the first step. Again thank you...
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